Becoming: Right Where You Are
Becoming Series: A Note from one SisterFriend to Another
This week’s reflection begins our Becoming conversation—for the in-between seasons, when you’re changing, and you don’t quite recognize yourself yet. Growth isn’t linear, and you don’t have to do it alone. Each reflection is an invitation to take one small step right where you are.
These reflections are written especially with Black, Brown, and Indigenous women in mind—women who carry so much, love so deeply, and are often asked to be strong before they are allowed to be human. I hope that as you read, you feel seen and reminded that you are worthy of care, not because you’ve earned it, but because you exist.
Settle in with your journal, take a breath, and move through each post at your own pace. May you bring every version of you forward with grace, and trust the process as you keep showing up for yourself.
SisterFriend Reflection: The in-between space still counts.
“I Am Changing.” —Dreamgirls
When I retired after 30 years in education, I felt a range of emotions, including relief. I knew it was time to chart a new path. I gave it my all. It was time for a change. But long after the congratulations slowed down and my calendar opened up, I started feeling something I didn’t expect: lost.
Not because I didn’t have a purpose. Not because I didn’t have plans. But because I had been so busy doing the work that I forgot how to just be me without the pace, the pressure, and the constant need to show up. Without the schedule, I could finally hear myself—and that took some getting used to.
It took me a good six months to be okay with silence, not filling it, not rushing past it, not immediately trying to “figure out what’s next” so I could feel like myself again. And that season taught me something I still come back to: sometimes you don’t recognize yourself when you’re in the middle of change—not broken. Not behind. Just in between.
So if you are in a season like that right now—where the old version of you doesn’t fit, but the new rhythms haven’t settled yet—I want you to hear this like a SisterFriend sitting close: You are not lost. You are not behind. You are right where you are—and this moment counts.
Change doesn’t always come with a clean plan. Sometimes it comes as a quiet shift-new boundaries, new desires, new honesty, a new “No.” Sometimes it’s simply this: I am changing. And changing doesn’t mean you were wrong before. It means you’re growing into your life as it is now. So if today feels like a blur or a question mark, don’t rush to label it as failure. Stay with yourself. Because the you that’s here right now—unsure, hopeful, tired, excited, figuring it out—is still you.
Purpose Meets Strategy (Take 10 minutes)
Name what changed: “This season shifted when…”
Name what you’re noticing: Right now I’m noticing…”
Choose one small support for this week: a 10-minute walk, a no-phone morning moment, a check-in with someone safe, or one boundary you will hold.
May you carry your wisdom forward without pressure. May you give yourself room to grow.
